redemption

So, I have been reading Thomas Hardy, which is never a good idea when you're already feeling melancholy, but nonetheless, I can never help myself. This time it was The Mayor of Casterbridge, which of course, if you have read it is very reminiscent of ANY Russian Literature - OKAY ENGLISH NERD ASIDE - "What is redemption and can you ever truly have it?" was the thought running through my head nearly the entire time. Is redemption like socialism, great in theory, but bad in practice? See, redemption is tricky. One's redemption depends on the forgiveness and mercy of those surrounding him. So, what if per chance, you are granted a second go - can you really overcome your past, when those around you won't let you? Still another - can you truly receive redemption if your same, old human flaws are still in place? Won't you just go down the same road again (uhum...Mayor of Casterbridge)? These questions are killing me. See, I am a negative optimist - hopelessly pragmatic, but with just enough happy to make me nonsensical at times. I want to believe in redemption - that at the end of Magnolia, each of the characters will find their way and make good with their second chances...but I don't know. I guess I just want to believe that once you have seen the truth, you can never live amongst lies again. And, if you find yourself in the same dark place again that you will be able to see it for what it truly is and pull yourself out. The scary thing is, regardless of scenario, true redemption does lay in the area surrounding each individual. Yes, you can experience a personal second chance, but unless those people around you choose to acknowledge the change, the lease will never be allowed. Sorry, I just wonder about these things.